


The Only Way To Get Rid Of A Temptation, Is To Yield To It.

by alexxxford



Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: M/M, Mildly Dubious Consent
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-12
Updated: 2013-03-12
Packaged: 2017-11-29 02:21:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 14,790
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/681610
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alexxxford/pseuds/alexxxford
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nico is having problems with blackmailers. Kimi offers to help, for a small fee. He thinks it will be easy to manipulate the situation to suit him but Nico is a little more difficult to handle than the blackmailers were..</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So I've been reading up on Oscar Wilde and this is based very loosely on Oscar and Bosie, my real life otp.  
> I have the basic story written (3 chapters) but if it goes down well I have a sequal planned. Enjoy!

Kimi is feeling pretty ridiculous in his suit. He doesn’t like to dress formal, if only for the fact it always signifies some pretentious event where there’s unlimited free alcohol that he can’t get drunk off and he’s asked stupid questions yet expected to give serious answers.

**_“So Kimi, what are your thoughts on the E21, do you like the addition of the red?”_ **

_‘You’re asking me about the colouring?!’ **“I don’t know yet, it seems good”**_ He shrugs in response.

**_“How do you think you’ll do this year? Do you think you have a chance of winning?”_ **

He almost has to work to keep his offence from being evident on his face.  **_“Obviously I think I have a chance otherwise I wouldn’t bother”_** he responds indignantly.

Eric is giving him a cautioning look but what does he expect? None of these reporters even seem to know the first thing about Formula One or Kimi himself and some of the questions they are asking are quite frankly, well, insulting.

20 minutes later he manages to skulk away reasonably unnoticed, not making eye contact with his boss. Heading to the bar he gets a vodka with ice. Well, two or three. By the fourth drinks time he decides he’d better stop as that familiar warm feeling in his stomach has stopped fading between drinks and he’s already contemplating just getting up and leaving…

His eyelids begin to grow heavy with the warm atmosphere inside the club but loud laughing grabs his attention.

 **Nico Rosberg.** The opposite of Kimi in so many ways. The half Finn is lavishing a shiny grey designer suit with shiny diamond cuff links and a pale blue waist coat with intricate designs on. He looks… well good would be a vast understatement.

Nico is, as always, surrounded by many admirers. Hanging off his every word. Beautiful people, but never as beautiful as him. Kimi’s almost sure the arrogant bastard makes sure of that on possible.

His head is tilted back in laughter, his eyes closed, long thick lashes fanned across his cheekbones. His adams apple bobbing in his throat. His mouth closes, his head tilting up and his eyes opening locking with Kimi. His lips form into a perfect smile. ~~Smirk.~~ His pale eyes twinkling. He holds Kimi’s gaze for merely a second but his interest for much longer.

Kimi’s really wondering how Nico manages to enjoy these kinds of events.

He turns back to the bar and signals to the barman for the same again. Two.

“Make that three.”

Kimi’s leaning on the bar casually. He manages to refrain from looking up at the soft accented voice in his ear but cannot stop the small smile spread across his face. He slides one of the three glasses across to his left, the back of his hand briefly making contact with Nico’s. He chucks the first back, hot liquid that warms all the way down his throat, before raising the second to his fellow driver. Nico gently touches his glass to Kimi’s and they both knock them back.

“Eugh” Nico moans and Kimi looks up, catching him wiping a drop of clear liquid from the corner of his lips with his tongue. “Yuck. You, man, have no taste” he teases, shaking his blonde hair out and scowling briefly.

Kimi frowns indignantly. Who is Nico to come over, order himself a drink with Kimi and then moan. He rolls his eyes, he doesn’t have time for young bright eyed drivers who still enjoying the partying. Accept Seb, who for some reason is his only exception,. It’s not that he’s so different from the others, it’s just that he approaches Kimi differently. He accepts him as he is and that’s enough for him.

“Obviously not” he grumbles, sliding another glare to his interrupter and pushing away from the bar he slides away.

The event drags on. Like _really_ drags. And Kimi’s ready to blow if anyone else asks him another question about adding fucking red to his car! He’s had too much to drink now too and he was gonna be no good to anyone.

“I’m off” he mumbles, keeping his voice down even lower than usually so Eric has no way of detecting how inebriated he actually is.

“Kimi, it’s only 12:30, we have another hour and a-“ Eric begins but is cut off by the driver he is powerless when trying to control.

“Sorry” he mutters and dips out, guiding through the packed bar and out into the hot Australian air. He lifts his cap momentarily and runs his hand through his hair.

_Man, what a shit night. The vodka was warm, the conversation was stale and there wasn’t even any hot women._

Kimi glances round the street when he sees a sight he wasn’t expecting. Nico is looking very flustered. He’s shed his suit jacket and is just in his shirt and waistcoat. He keeps pushing his hand through his hair and is tapping his phone, holding it to his ear momentarily before dropping it down and cursing.  
Kimi leans back against the bare brick wall of the club and decides to simply… observe, the younger driver.

Nico is pacing frustratedly. Someone comes up to him, someone he obviously knows, an attractive looking boy, maybe a few years younger. He tries to calm Nico down but the German is having none of it, shaking his head.

“Leave me alone!” he finally snaps and the boy hurries off looking genuinely hurt by Nico’s harsh words and even harsher tone.

This is when Kimi decides to step in, lighting a cigarette and popping it in his mouth to hide his smirk. He strolls over. _Swaggers_ over. Stopping about a foot away from Nico who is hanging up his phone for the fifth time. He spins around exasperated and comes face to face with Kimi, making him step back in surprise.

Kimi simply raises an eyebrow, taking the cigarette from his lips and blowing the smoke out, across Nico’s face, making him screw up his nose.

“What do you want?” he snaps, shoving his phone in his back pocket.

“I was bored” he shrugs. “This looks… _interesting”_

“Well good for you” Nico begins storming off down the road to the taxi rank at the other side of the building.

Kimi follows casually, trying to decide whether to ask what’s going on now or just wait for Nico to spill it all to him later. They stop by the queue for the cabs and Nico looks even more annoyed, obviously not expecting one and clearly contemplating whether to pull the _‘don’t you know who I am card’._ But to Kimi’s amusement something obviously stops him and he gets in line, shaking his head.

“You’re still here?” he says without looking at Kimi.

“Told you, I’m bored” Kimi strolls down the queue but there is no one more interesting. He checks out the taxi as it pulls up. He sighs, a Kia. He heads back over to Nico who’s watching him. _Glaring_ at him. “You seem… _stressed_?” he ponders, stubbing out the cigarette on the wall and flicking it carelessly.

“Stressed? Me? No way!” Nico mumbles sarcastically folding his arms and rolling his eyes. “Look, what are you doing?” His blue eyes flick up to Kimi’s and the older mans expression sets him on edge.

“I thought maybe I could invite you back with me?” Kimi asks sounding self-assured as ever.

Nico raises his eyebrows incredulously “Go back with you? No I’m okay thanks” her turns back to the queue, if he’s calculating right there’s only two groups in front of him now, and as another cab pulls up to the curb so he thinks it won’t be long now.

“I could um… help you relax?” and Kimi’s tone is thick and velvet and wraps around Nico, making him shiver.

“Look K-“ he stops abruptly  as he feels Kimi close behind him, his hot breath against his neck. He swallows and starts again. “Look, I’ve got myself into enough trouble going _back_ with people right?”

And Kimi can’t help but smirk a little. “Yeah, I know” he says quietly, stepping infront of Nico to claim the next taxi that pulls up. He finally lets up what he’s really doing to pleasing results, Nico’s jaw nearly hits the floor. “You getting in?”

Nico shakes his head, snapping out of his surprise. “That’s my cab!” he scowls but Kimi just raises his eyebrows so he sighs and gets in, glaring at the older man. He opens his mouth to name his hotel but is interrupted.

“The Mariott” Kimi instructs.

“That’s not my hotel!” Nico tells him before realising that Kimi already knew that, and that it was probably Kimi’s hotel. Definitely Kimi’s hotel. He sighs, dropping back dramatically into the chair and pinching the bridge of his nose frustratedly, trying to relieve some of the pressure there. He’d been happily tipsy only half an hour ago but now he just felt sober an miserable.

“It’s nice I promise” and Nico can hear the smirk in Kimi’s voice.

“What do you mean _‘you know?_ ’” He asks at last. “What do you know? How do you know?” Nico’s voice comes out uncharacteristically harsh but he’s not unhappy about this.

Kimi likes to play his cards close to his chest but he can tell by Nico’s tone that he’s not in the mood and that if he pushes him too much.. _he’ll snap.  
_ “Michael told me”

Nico is angry at his teammate for blabbing. He hadn’t meant for Michael to find out, and when he had he’d sworn him to secrecy. Whenever Michael had brought it up, he’d shut him off. Still, he meant well. Maybe…

“What did he tell you?”

There’s an atmosphere in the cab. It’s tense. Nico is tense. Kimi is more relaxed. He still feels hot on the inside from the alcohol, and maybe a little from Nico.

He’s very careful about how he words his reply, he doesn’t want Nico to put up any more barriers, to make him anymore defensive, otherwise the dull ache in his balls is just not going to be resolved…

“He told me you were having… _issues,_ shall we say, with some _former acquaintances_ ”

“I didn’t think you were into gossip” Nico grumbles, trying to wound Kimi just a little, to level the field.

“He thought I could help you. And I agree.” He turns to the driver whos now arrived outside the hotel and his clearing his throat to get their attention, clearly hoping they’ll get out quickly so he can move onto the next job. Kimi pays, tips him generously because he can. Nico seems happy to let him foot the bill, but then again, he has kind of been taken hostage.  
He looks around as if searching for an escape but makes little argument of following Kimi across the posh marble lobby and into an ornate mirrored lift, gentle yet irritating harp music is playing from hidden speakers and Kimi presses the button for floor 13.  
“Chin up, no need to look so miserable” Kimi laughs, tilting the Germans face up with a light touch. Nico yanks his chin away, glowering at the wall.

“I don’t see why you both think you can do anything that I can’t” he says and Kimi see’s for the first time that his pride is actually hurt, so he decides to soften his approach.

“Hey he didn’t mean it like that, he only wanted to he-“

“I don’t need anyone’s help!” Nico snaps, throwing his arms in the air as he exits the lift dramatically, before stopping, realising he has no idea which is Kimi’s room.

Kimi strides past him, still confident he’ll follow, but throws an encouraging look over his shoulder still, to make it easier for him.

Once in his room Kimi pulls out a bottle of vodka to pour himself a drink. He pours in a large measure then tops it up with tonic. He begins to pour Nico’s one, slowly so he can be stopped at any point but when Nico’s hand reaches out to cover his, it’s not to still it, but to tip the bottle further so that the whole glass is quickly filled with the clear liquid.

Kimi watches, somewhat amused, as his friend takes a large gulp, his face contorting as he swallows. “I hate vodka” he mumbles before taking another an pulling the same face. “I like wine. And champagne” and Kimi believes him simply on the fact he has to take a deep breath to prepare himself for each gulp. Nevertheless it takes him only a couple of minutes to finish the glass, quicker than it takes Kimi to finish his mixed drink, and he’s reaching over to the bottle and drinking what’s left in there too. In no more than five minutes Kimi has witnessed Nico drink almost a litre of vodka, a feat that he himself would be proud of, and is now ready for his next step. He gets up from where he’s been sat observing the other man, who is now laying out on his back on the bed like a starfish.

“I can help. I can make them stop. It will be easy”

Nico looks up at him, he has one eyebrow raised in interest but clearly still isn’t sold on the idea.

“You have to trust me though”

“Why?”

“Because if you don’t I can’t help and from what I can tell, you need the help”

“No” Nico sits up, waving his hand at Kimi, his eyes not focusing, his voice slurring. _Yeah, he’s wasted. Disgustingly so._ “Why would you help me?”

Kimi circles round to the bed and stand in front of Nico. “Because I can. Because Michael asked me to. Because it’s fun to scare people. _Because you might give me something in return_ …” his voice trails off and he looks at the wall, straight over Nico’s head, but he still sees it snap up.

“Wh… what do you want?” And Nico actually sounds scared. Like he’s in way over his head. He sounds vulnerable and that’s just too damn much for Kimi to take and before he can stop himself, he’s down on top of him, forcing his mouth against the younger man’s roughly, taking the other and himself by total surprise.   
A moment later however Nico has got control of himself again and is shoving the Finn off. “What’re you doing?!” he yells, wiping his mouth but his expression lacks some conviction.

Kimi is panting, smiling because Nico taste as great as he’d imagined and now he’s really hard and really has to have him, like right now.

“I’ll sort them out, get them to stop blackmailing you forever. All you have to do is let me fuck you” he states. Trying not to sound as desperate as he feel. And there, he’s said it. To him it seems perfectly fair.

Nico’s face screws up “You’re disgusting!” but again his face is giving it away, even as he flattens down his waistcoat and hair, checking every blonde lock is in position. Every blond lock that Kimi so desperately wants to run his fingers through, to yank and pull, to make Nico whine and comply to him.

“The choice is yours” he shrugs, getting up and walking towards the balcony and opening the doors, letting the warm night air and the bustle of the city below enter the room. Crowd the room. Giving Nico less of chance to get his head straight. “It’s up to you” he repeats, smiling out at the night, sure in himself that he’s played this just right.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bit shorter, bit smuttier

_*“I’ll sort them out, get them to stop blackmailing you forever. All you have to do is let me fuck you” he states. And there, he’s said it. To him it seems perfectly fair._

_Nico’s face screws up “You’re disgusting!” but again his face is giving it away, even as he flattens down his waistcoat and hair, checking ever blonde lock is in position. Every blond lock that Kimi so desperately wants to run his fingers through, to yank and pull, to make Nico whine and comply to him._

_“The choice is yours” he shrugs, getting up and walking towards the balcony and opening the doors, letting the warm night air and the bustle of the city below enter the room. Crowd the room. Giving Nico less of chance to get his head straight.*_

 

He has to admit, he doesn’t notice Nico getting up off the bed and crossing the room. He jumps at the gentle touch to his back.

“So that’s it? You’d do all that, _just_ to fuck me?” Nico pronounces each syllable carefully, a slight leer in his voice that makes Kimi shudder.

“It’s not-“ he tries to defend himself but is cut off.

“I had no idea I was that appealing to you” he walks round next to Kimi who turns to face him. He’s biting his lip seductively, hands stroking up his abs, lifting his shirt up a few inches. “Is it… my body maybe?” he slowly lifts the shirt up over his head, eyeing Kimi, enticing him. The Finn remains dead still, watching with increased intensity. Nico turns slowly, raising his arms. “I’ve been working out, did you notice?” and he’s playing quite a game as he raises his arms slowly above his head, giving Kimi a good view of the rippling muscles as they contract across his smooth back. He reaches out and lowers them “Corse you did” and he sounds so damn cocky that Kimi wants to hit him but he’s also kind of enjoying it… Kind of doesn’t want him to stop.

“Don’t push it” he says through gritted teeth but a smile is fighting its way onto his lips and as Nico turns slowly, clearly too self-assured to think there’s anyway Kimi could back out now his hands drop to his belt.

“Hermes” he practically purrs, as he slides the leather through the buckles. In one fluid movement he has it off and drops it to the floor with a loud clutter. His fingers play gently across his stomach, commanding every inch of the Finn’s attention. “ _Very_ expensive. Like me” and he winks and jolts of electricity are pulsing through Kimi’s veins.  
Suddenly Nico’s hand plunges below the waistband of his trousers and obviously takes hold of himself, his head tilting back, his mouth parted slightly. Kimi doesn’t even mean to but he’s stepped forwards, up to Nico. He reaches out, but Nico jumps back, removing his hand. He shakes his head slyly at his friend, tutting. “Now now Mr, you must have patience” and he laughs at the end, a mocking laugh and walks away from Kimi, a few paces, and with his back to Kimi drops his trousers _and_ underpants. “You know I was going to go to bed when I got in, but I don’t feel so tired now”

“Nico what are you playing at?” Kimi was getting frustrated now. Getting tired and his pent up frustration was swallowing him yet was so enticed by the scene he somehow kept his tone softish.

Nico spins on his heels. “You want to fuck me, but what am I going to do with this?” his eyes drop down to his groin, his hand stroking gently across his cock.

The next thing either of them know Kimi has thrown Nico down onto the bed and is pinning him down and jerking him off.

“You’re such.a. _fucking._ piece or work” he growls threw gritted teeth but Nico’s head is thrown back, his eyes shut, a smirk across his perfect lips.

“Anything good takes working for” he responds but he’s looking a little less cool, his blonde hair brushed back away from his face, his eyes closing tightly as Kimi squeezes him a little. It’s feels great. Kimi thinks he might push himself over the edge just by watching Nico squirm beneath his tough, his hips bucking up meet Kimi’s hand with more force, his hands winding into the sheets below him, his tongue wetting his lips making Kimi want to kiss him but no, he mustn’t get into that romantic stuff, he just needs a straight fuck and a clean break, as with the others.   
  
He works hard and fast and as soon as Nico cums Kimi has flipped him over onto his stomach and is preparing him. “You better make this worth my while” he shaking his head, gripping Nico’s hips tightly, definitely leaving marks on the pale skin.

“I always do darling” Nico teases.  
  
Nico doesn’t speak during sex. Kimi likes that. As he eases himself in he can feel the younger man quiver and buckle so he holds him up, worried he’s hurt him but soon the German is pushing back against him and Kimi can be as rough as he wants. Can take out all his anger and frustration out, Can lose it all.

A long throaty groan escapes Kimi’s lips accidently and he’s blushing but luckily Nico can’t see and it only serves to spur him on.

“Yessss” he hisses softly, adjusting his weight on his arms, lifting his head up momentarily to suck in deep breaths to try and keep feeding oxygen to his racing heart.

Kimi lasts for less time than he’d like, it’s a struggle to hold on at the end as he can feel sensations begin to overwhelm him and swallow him so he reaches round, grabbing Nico’s painfully hard cock to bring him over the edge with him.

He feels so much better afterwards. He didn’t even know he felt so bad before until after. He wants to collapse. He wants the feel of Nico’s hot, moist skin against his. But neither of them is prepared for that. For what that would portray.  
Nico seems to realise Kimi needs the time, so he gets up, picking Kimi’s cigarettes off the table and lighting one, wandering over to the balcony and blowing the smoke away from the hotel room, still completely naked.  
Kimi watches curiously, shifting into a comfy position.

“So, what’re you gonna do?” Nico turns around, eyeing Kimi a little suspiciously. The Finn looks confused making him roll his eyes frustrated. “The blackmailers” he prompts, taking another long drag, bright eyes twinkling.

“Oh, leave it to me” Kimi struggles with the quilt before frustratingly throwing it off. He begins searching for his clothes.

“I want to know” Nico pouts but Kimi just shakes his head, frustrating the younger man. “You had better hold up your end of the bargain”

Kimi straightens up, almost fully clothes now. “I will” he says sternly, a little annoyed to be almost accused of lying.

“Good” Nico nods, stubbing out the cigarette in a glass dish and throwing it over the balcony. “I’d better go then” he says, nothing in his voice to give Kimi any indication of his mood. He strolls back across the apartment and starts to dress himself, quickly, in total contrast to the way he’d undressed.

Kimi was in half a mind to ask him to stay but he knows it would be totally inappropriate. He then considers offer to call him a cab but Nico is already fully dress and arranging his hair in the mirror.

“How do I look?” he asks in jest, turning to face his exhausted companion. Nico’s eyes a slightly bloodshot, his blonde hair is a total mess and his suit which probably costs the same amount as many peoples cars is rumpled. He looks a mess really, but not to Kimi. To Kimi he is so appealing he has to close his fighting back a smirk.

“ _Shit_ ” he grins.

“Fuck you” Nico responds but when he opens his eyes he’s smiling to. “Well, good luck” he says and leaves, leaving Kimi wondering how the hell he is actually going to stop Nico’s blackmailers from selling a story that could potentially earn them thousands…


	3. Chapter 3

8am? Who the fuck is at Kimi’s door at 8am? His body is heavy and sore. He hasn’t been taking care of himself recently. He drags himself out of bed, pulling his tracksuit bottoms up a bit and running his hands through his hair which is sticking up all over the place.

He wasn’t going to answer but the knocking was insistent and was beginning to driving him mad.

“What?” he growls, throwing the door open. He doesn’t see who it is immediately as the bright light from the corridor burns his eyes. As they adjust he realises the culprit. Nico. He’s immaculately groomed despite the time in dark jeans and a brown leather jacket with a pale blue scarf hung loosely around his neck, his blonde hair ‘elegantly dishevelled’.

Nico gives him a quick nod and walks straight past him into the room. “So, how did you do it?” he paces straight into Kimi’s room, opening the mini fridge, checking the bottles, and pulling out a bottle of Tanqueray and pouring himself a glass with ice, before straightening up and raising an eyebrow at Kimi, still awaiting his response..

“Do what?” Kimi frowns, still 80% asleep and thinking it’s a bit early to be drinking, especially gin, yet he still nods his head, indicating for his intruder to pour him one.

He strolls over, taking the glass from him. Their hands brush, sending a jolt through Kimi, a jolt he doesn’t want to acknowledge. He stops, right there, right infront of Nico, so close the tips of their toes almost touch, and looks at him hard, taking a large sip from the smooth liquor.

“Save me” Nico says cooly, his voice soft, his words unexpected. “Did er.. _these_ have anything to do with it?” he nods slowly at the small split on Kimi’s lip and the light blue bruising above his eyebrow.

Kimi can feel himself blushing, not wanting Nico to know the trouble he’d been through to deter the blackmailers and remembering why he ached quite so much this morning.

He shrugs, pulling away so as to hide any visible emotions.

“You’re not going to tell me” Nico observes, correctly. He tips back the bottom of his gin and places the glass down on the counter. “I’ll go” he passes Kimi but stops before the door.

“Why did you come here?” the Finn asks, downing his drink.

“I said. I wanted to know how you’d… done what I couldn’t”

“You knew I wouldn’t tell you”

Nico’s piercing blue green eyes hold Kimi hold his steadily and it unnerves Kimi as most people can’t stare him out like that.

“I um, also wanted to make sure we’d… settled” his eyes flicker over Kimi briefly and he’s beginning to annoy Kimi now. He’s like a closed book. He’s playing so damn carefully and his caginess is really frustrating.

“We are” Kimi says sharply.

“Bye then”

Kimi stands silently, eyes fixed on the door for a few moments after Nico had left, looking where the taller German had been stood. He felt like he could almost see the outline. Like he was imprinted on the air.

Kimi was drunk. He wasn’t sure why. He was used to drinking. He could handle his booze very well and knew how much he could drink to stay in control and how much to go crazy. He was at a, somewhat formal party, throw for the drivers by the bbc. Really just a chance for certai people to brush shoulders and as he suspected, to catch the drivers off guard to get an inside scoop.

It certainly wasn’t a place he should be getting inebriated. He’d known that when he’d ordered all those doubles and cocktails and shots and now here he was in a situation he despised and _always_ managed to avoiding. Being too drunk. Being inappropriately drunk. Being drunk at a time when he shouldn’t have his mind compromised.

And where was Heikki? He’d been bored shitless for the past hour waiting for the younger Finn who’s time management was apparently  worse than his own.

“So, you did it?”

Kimi jumped at the faint German accent that rang through his ears and turned to see the tall tanned figure of Michael Schumacher had joined him at the bar.

“Did what?”

“You know what” Michael took the fresh drink Kimi had ordered and downed it. Kimi wanted to tell him to fuck off but it was probably in his best interest the drink was gone and also he felt it would lead to an even longer conversation and more effort on his part.

“Yeah I said I would” Kimi shrugs. He hadn’t spotted Nico yet, although he knew he was here. He was probably on the dance floor or something pretentious like that.

“And did he… _thank_ you?”

And suddenly Kimi feels sick, like Michael knows something that he doesn’t or just that he knows Nico more than he does. He throws him a look. “He did” he responds curtly.

Michael smiles, angering him further although for no apparent reason. “Yes, he’s good at that. He’ll always… _say thanks._ ”

“Quite” Kimi swallows loudly

Michaels eyes survey Kimi for a moment longer before he finishes the drink and gets up.

“Well, it was nice… talking to you. I’d better head off. Have a good night. Not too good though, alright?” and there’s something in the older mans eyes that Kimi doesn’t like but he can’t place it so he has to ignore it. He wishes he wasn’t so drunk so he could see the whole situation clearly but maybe if he was sober.. well he’d see there really was no situation..?

He orders another drink before deciding to wander round. He’s not looking for Nico. No he doesn’t want to talk or anything. He just wants to check out the venue. And its bugging him that he knows Nico’s there and yet hasn’t seen him yet. I mean, it doesn’t matter that its Nico. It could be anyone…

He finds Nico at a booth near the dj. He’s surrounded by people. Young attractive people. Mostly boys. Four boys. Two girls. He has an extra attractive boy sat to his left. Nico’s arm is draped around the boys shoulder casually and Kimi can feel his blood boiling because has the idiot learnt nothing over this whole ordeal? Yeah, that’s why.

He storms over to the table, eyeing the champagne bottles littered across it in varying degrees of emptiness. He knows that champagne goes for a few hundred euros a bottle.

“A word?” his voice is cool like ice and demanding. He can see Nico’s six guests shrink under it but Nico takes a moment to even look up at Kimi.

“What word is that?” his voice is thick like caramel and Kimi feels like its suffocating him. He snaps, grabbing Nico roughly by the elbow and dragging him up from the booth, marching him across the dancefloor and outside so that he can give him a piece of his drunken mind.  
“Nobody like a man who can’t hold his alcohol” Nico grumbles, straightening his clothing down and glaring indignantly at his ‘attacker’.

"Who're they?" Kimi asks harshly ignoring the scowl he's receiving off of the German.   
   
Nico shrugs. "Just friends"  
   
"Do you trust them?"  
   
He raises an eyebrow and a slight smirk appears on his face. "As much as I trust you. There are few people I trust completely"  
   
This angers Kimi and he doesn't even know why he came over here or why he cares. He shakes his head and storms back into the club, barging past the innocent people who get in his was he heads straight back to the bar and orders a row of drinks all for himself.   
   
"You alright mate?" he feels a hard thump on his back and is about to tell the own of the hand which is now resting on his shoulder where to go when he realizes its Heikki. Good old reliable Heikki. One of his closest friends. He could take Heikki home if he didn't want to be alone.   
He patted the stool beside him and gestures sloppily for the barman to send him some drinks.

They down drinks, catching up on how the seasons gone so far. Who racing well and who’s just a disgrace (Kimi has a long list for the latter but Heikki takes it all with a pinch of salt as his friends drunk and seemingly in a very bad mood).

“Fuck, it’s nearly two, I’d better be on my way” Heikki looks genuinely flustered.

“On your way?” Kimi’s eyebrows shoot up, Heikki couldn’t leave. _Without him anyway…_

“Yeah my sister will be landing in like… five hours” he jumps up of the stool.

“Nooo, but, you’re coming back with me. I’m not gooooing alone” Kimi struggles over his words, trying to sound forceful rather than needy.

Heikki looks worried, “You can’t I..” he struggles to say not to the older Finn.

"He can come back with me" A cool voice cuts him off, sounding in Kimi's ear, cutting through the bassy music in the club. He knows it's Nico immediately but he's too far gone to react in anyway other than to smirk at Heikki. If he doesn't want him, there's always someone else.   
   
Heikki looks nervous at the prospect of handing over such a vulnerable Kimi to Nico who, as far as he is aware, neither of them really know. He knows about him, sure, everybody does. Nico's name had started circulating when he was still in gp2. His dad was a big name in formula one so that was an instant claim to fame but Nico had quickly made sure he wants going to be over shadowed by his fathers rep.   
Most of what Heikki had heard about the young driver was second hand knowledge and Chinese whispers. He knew that women fell at his feet but rumour had it Nico was batting for the other side, if you get what he means.   
   
"It's okay, I can drop him off" Heikki responds politely yet firmly. He doesn't like the way Nico is looking at Kimi. Amusement on his face. And something else... almost a hunger.   
   
"Don't wnnbb alone" Kimi slurs.  By now his arms are folded on the bar and his head is resting on them.   
   
"I'll take you-"  
   
"Heikki I've called a cab. We'll be fine from here. Thanks for looking after him for me" he adds snootily before lifting Kimi off the stool and directing him to the door.   
   
There's nothing Heikki can do except pray that Kimi regains soberness before he does something he regrets and will have to pay for later..  
He drops a line to his sister saying he'll be home soon but wishing deep down that he wouldn't be. Wishing he wouldn't be alone tonight in bed... 


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nico and Kimi come to an agreement...

_*"Heikki I've called a cab. We'll be fine from here. Thanks for looking after him for me" Nico adds snootily before lifting Kimi off the stool and directing him to the door.  
   
There's nothing Heikki can do except pray that Kimi regains soberness before he does something he regrets and will have to pay for later..  
He drops a line to his sister saying he'll be home soon but wishing deep down that he wouldn't be. Wishing he wouldn't be alone tonight in bed...*_  
   
Nico instructs the young driver of his address and Kimi is sure he's even making eyes at him. _Flirt._  
   
"What's this, some kind of payback" the Finn raises an eye brow. His brain is clearing a little now he's out of the noisy club but his head is still spinning and his body feels like lead so he's slumped against the door of the cab, legs stretched out so that his calf is rubbing against Nico's.   
   
"I was under the impression I was don't you a favour" Nico shrugs, checking his nails. "You could have stayed"  
   
Kimi doesn't really recall the taxi journey. It's a bit of a blur, but then again the whole night has been and now he's ended up in Nico's apartment. _Especially seeing as he had forgotten he was in Monaco._  
   
"This is actually your place?" Kimi wonders aloud, feeling like he might have to try a bit harder not to be sick anywhere.   
   
"Yes" is all Nico replies, as soon as he gets into his apartment digging out some stripped boxers and a white tshirt for Kimi to sleep in. He points his guest to the bathroom and Kimi changes clumsily. The tshirt is a little on the tight side but Kimi figures it defines his figure in a flattering way which makes him like it. Well that and the strong obvious scent of Nico present on it.   
   
When he re-enters the main area of Nico's apartment he takes it all in. The apartment is a big square space, the two walls facing outwards are lines with large floor to ceiling windows. The far corner is a lounge area with big black leather corner sofas and poofs and a large wide screen tv. He has shelves of CD's neatly across the solid wall. Up his side of the room, in the corner nearer the front door is the kitchen, a large black marble affair with orangey wooden draws and expensive looking appliance. The small hallway between the door and this main room as two doors, the bathroom he just used on the left, so presumably the bedroom on the right.   
   
"Your place is small" Kimo notes upon entering to home Nico sipping champagne, relaxed in an armchair next to a large four poster bed. Poser.   
   
"I don't usually have guests here. It's kind of.. my own place" he admits and Kimi instantly feels mean.   
Nico’s apartment is at the corner of the building do bedroom has a balcony. Kimi's sure the views out the French doors are amazing but he's enjoying his own view right now as Nico sets down the empty flute on the table.   
The apartment is small, but it’s luxury. Modern. It oozes design and expense. It’s cosy though, all the same. Kimi quite likes it. The house is the first real insight he’s got into Nico. Nico puts on a front, the _flirt, beautiful, young, rich, talented._ But it’s a front, and Kimi wants to know what’s beneath.  
   
"You get in, I have to make. Couple of calls. I'll join you after. I.. If that's okay" the moment of unsureness surprises Kimi but he's glad to see it, Iike a foot hole in this impossible hill he's trying to climb... trying to climb without Nico even realising..  
   
The next thing Kimi knows its morning. Well, afternoon. The lime green fluorescent numbers on Nico's alarm clock (a flat glass plate affair that Kimi can't get his head around where the electricity is coming from) reads 13:15 and he cants believe he's slept so long. Then again if he can get a comfy few hours under a table, 11 hours on Nico's king size water bed is that surprising...  
He's totally embarrassed. Even when he sleeps with a woman he never stays the night. Nico is nowhere to be seen so he jumps out of bed to change. He hunts around for his clothes but he can't find them anywhere and realize bloody Nico must have put them somewhere. Reluctantly he forces himself out of the room and back into Nico's lounge.   
   
Nico is sat at the table on his laptop. He's dressed down in a white polo shirt and dark grey track suit bottoms, his blond hair is pushed off of his face and he's sipping from a mug Kimi can smell is coffee.   
   
He clears his throat quietly to get the young mans attention and Nico's head snaps up. Kimi is braced for the worse, internally cringing of what Nico will say next. There's nothing even to say he'll probably just laugh!  
But he doesn't and Kimi has never felt so grateful for anything because he doesn't even smile. He just looks up at Kimi, big blue green eyes.   
   
"Morning" he says softly.   
   
"Morning" Kimi repeats cautiously, not seeing where this is going.   
   
"I made pancakes" Nico says getting up and strolling past him to the kitchen. "What do you want on yours" he opens the grill where he's keeping them warm.   
   
"Er thanks but.. I better go. I just.. need my clothes" and Kimi feels like maybe this is a trap.   
   
"I put them in the wash, they were filthy. They'll be a couple of hours still." he slips a couple of pancakes into a square plate.   
   
"You didn't have to. I will be expected.."  
   
"It's okay. What do you like? Nutella? Ice cream? I have fruit too.."  
   
"C.. Can I bo-" Kimi's about to ask if he can just borrow something but Nico slams the plate down making him jump.   
   
"Well I've made them so you may as well have some" He snaps.   
   
"Ice cream would be nice"  
   
"Bananas?"  
   
"Sure"  
   
So Kimi goes and sits awkwardly at Nico's breakfast  bar, in Nico's boxers, and watches him as he scoops carte dor on his panes and slicing a banana before covering them in a dusting of icing sugar before serving them to him.   
   
"I never had you for some sort f domestic goddess" Kimi forces a joke to lighten the atmosphere.   
   
Nico shrugs. "I rarely have anyone to cook for. I'll go find you some clothes to borrow" he says taking himself off back into the bedroom. He reemerges a while later. "I've laid some trousers out for you that are too big for me. They.. might be a bit long" and finally he's teasing Kimi who replies simply.   
   
"Fuck off".   
   
Nico laughs and site down across from him. "How're you feeling?"  
   
"Fine" he shrugs, shoveling the last of his delicious pancakes into his mouth Nico thinks rather un-attractively.   
   
"You had a good night?"  
   
He shrugs, pushing the plate away which Nico takes and puts into one of those dishwasher's that's disguised as a cupboard.   
   
"You?"  
   
"Well I wasn't expecting to sleep on my couch. You know you take up a whole bed?"  
   
"You didn't have to take me back"  
   
"Well I was hoping it would.. pay off. That didn't happen" he rolls his eyes but says it in humor. "You owe me"  
   
"Fuck off"  
   
Kimi feels nervous. Sleeping with someone once is not a big deal but if you do it again.. it starts something yet he couldn't deny to himself that he very much liked the idea of fucking Nico again.

"You do! Three thousands euro’s on a sofa and it’s still done my back in" Nico is peering up at Kimi through his eyelashes. He’s flicked from domestic Nico to Seductive Nico and Kimi didn’t even notice. “Besdies, I didn’t think you’d mind. You enjoyed it last time..”  
   
"It was okay" he says flatly though the corners of his mouth are tugging in a smile he's trying to hide, he tilts his head to try an cover his face with his hair to hide his expression but he can hear Nico chuckle.   
   
"Just okay? No I think you thought more of it than that"  
  
Kimi wants to hit Nico but he’s chuckling now too. “Suppose..  we do do it again” he says and the mood turns serious.

“I don’t see why not”

Kimi’s heart is hammering in his chest so hard it almost hurts and his throat tightens. He has to take a deep breath to clear his mind. “Okay.” He says, working hard at sounding passive. “Tonight?”

“Next week. There’s that Pirelli event? I’ll book us a room for after” and Kimi can’t see why not. Nico has captivated his attention in a way few others have managed, and just looking at him, even when they were in the paddock in a completely professional atmosphere, was giving him flashbacks of the other night. Of Nico’s soft skin and breathy sighs. His fresh scent and the feel of his hands, massaging Kimi’s back and eliciting feeling of lust in Kimi is craving again.

“Alright” he nods casually.

“I’ll go get your stuff then” And Nico bounds off and returns moments later with Kimi’s neatly cleaned and pressed clothes and suddenly he gets the feeling they were ready before he was this morning…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a heads up, when this is finished I'll probably arrange the chapter's to the days they're set.


	5. Chapter 5

Kimi looked at himself in the mirror. Usually, he would be dreading an event such as this, and whilst he was feeling anxious, it was for a whole different reason.

He slips both his cufflinks into their slits and regards himself again, stepping back to get a fuller view of himself, a pale grey shirt tucked into suit trousers and almost laughs.

“Fuck this” the grumbles, ripping the silver cufflinks out again and rolling the sleeves up, swapping the trousers for a dark jeans and feeling more like himself. He grabs his phone and wallet, shoving them in his back pockets.   
He wanders around his room, trying to kill time for a bit so as not to turn up early. Fancy that, him. Early.

The function started at 9, and at ten past Kimi finally lets himself ring a taxi and is on his way by half past, arriving just before ten. Early that evening a young woman had dropped an envelope off for him. Inside was a key card and a wimple note reading just 247. He knew immediately it was from Nico and it was their hotel room and it had sent chills down his spine in anticipation of what the night might hold.

There are a  lot of people at the event that Kimi has to talk to. To humour. He manages to keep his mood light and behaviour polite for the best part of two hours, which is something of a record for him, but upon spotting Nico, arm slung across Lewis Hamilton’s shoulder casually, he finally snaps.

**_‘What kind of lap times will you be looking to set this weekend?’_ **

_‘Quick ones’_ he responds without a hint of humour and makes his exit. He’s about to march straight over to Nico and Lewis when he notices Nico’s dad is stood with them and he halts in his tracks. Bloody hell, now what?

He’s about to make a b-line for the bar instead when Nico looks up and spots him, their eyes locking, the electricity passing between them, even 10 foot away from eachother. Even in a bar with 200 hundred other people Kimi is drawn to Nico.  
He looks stunning. He’s wearing a deep blue suit, with tightfitting tapered trousers with a white shirt and skinny black tie. There’s something… rock and roll about the look. He looks a bit more rough around the edges. He likes it.

A small smile creeps across Nico’s lip and he nods to invite him over. Kimi hesitates but eventually walks over.

“Hi” he says quietly.

“Kimi!” Nico beams, oozing confidence he removes himself from Lewis and rests his hand on Kimi’s back. “You’ve met my father Keke?”

He introduces. Keke doesn’t smiles at Kimi. He regards his son first, then his eyes flicker over him distrustingly. It makes Kimi shudder. It’s as if he knows..

“I believe so” Keke says gruffly, taking Kimi’s hand and shaking it firmly.

“How are you Mr Rosberg?”

“I’m good, you?”

They soon fall into and uneasy, unnatural conversation about the cars on the grid this season whilst Nico flits around between them, in his element, introducing Kim to more people, ordering them drinks as they ran out and flicking his blonde hair about in a way that was driving Kimi crazy.

“Well, I better go” Keke finally takes his leave, he hugs his son briefly before shooting that odd look. “Ole hyva” he mumbles briskly before walking away. Nico doesn’t seem to hear as he’s laughing with someone else. Finally he’s ~~flirted with~~ spoken to seemingly everyone in the club and is back over with Kimi.

“You ready to leave?” his voice is thick and soft and velvety in kimi’s ear and Kimi has to swallow hard to keep his mind straight. He’s been ready to leave since before he even got here. He’s been ready since Monaco. He can’t shake this Nico thing from his mind. He can hear his voice when it’s silent, see his face when he closes his eyes. He figures the only way to get over him, is to get his leg over.

He nods, smirking, and the two of them make no secret of leaving together. All the press is gone and Kimi thoroughly enjoys the look of horror on his bosses face.

“Heikki looked jealous that you left with me” Nico says, not even pretending to sound guilty or remorseful. In fact, he sounds positively proud. ~~  
~~ ~~~~  
“What was your dads deal?” Kimi ignores his comment.

Nico is still buzzing from the bar. He thrives in these situation and he’s still glowing now. He’s not really listening or paying attention to Kimi, watching the city pass them by out the window, winking at a guy outside a bar as they pull up at traffic lights, and giggling as they speed of just as the guy gets up. “he’s suspicious. He doesn’t… agree with my antics” Nico shrugs.

“He knows?!” Kimi is gobsmacked.

“As I said” Nico begins, catching himself in the mirror and checking his hair, smiling at the frustrated looking driver trying to see out of the rear view window. “he has his suspicions. But it’s none of his business” he shrugs. “I don’t care what he thinks”.

Kimi is quiet. Quieter than normal. Nico doesn’t notice. He’s excited to have Kimi here with him. Having Kimi’s attention. He knows that’s not easy to get and it makes him feel arrogant.

Nico encourages Kimi to tip the taxi driver lavishly, and then they both cross the lobby, walking close together, and up in the lift. They are on the top flood in a room on the end.

“Come on baby!” Nico cheers, almost skipping.

“Shh” Kimi shh’s him, scared people will hear them, not sure he feels quite as comfortable about all this as Nico.

Nico turns, facing him “We have the floor” he winks, and suddenly the distance between them is non-existent and Nico’s hand is pressed firmly between Kimi’s thighs and his lips have connect with the pulse in his neck, sucking, softly at first, gently nipping at the sensitive skin, til Kimi’s back collides with the wall and Nico has him where he wants, sinking his teeth into the older man’s shoulder. A hiss escapes through Kimi’s teeth as the pain from his clavicle throbs and turns to pleasure, arousing his further. Nico’s other hand is pulling Kimi’s shirt out of his jeans and sliding up across his stomach, his short clipped nails scratching repetitive paths towards the waist band of his trousers.

“Jeans” Nico breaths questioningly and Kimi can hear the eye-rolling in his voice and he smiles.

"Don't you like them?" Kimi breaths, glad now that he'd swapped his suit trousers for jeans.   
   
"I'll like them" Nico says coolly, teeth grazing at Kimi's ear lobe. "better off" and it's such a cheesy line but when he says it it doesn't sound that was at all. It just fits and drives Kimi wild, his hips bucking forward to grind against Nico's who pushes back, holding him between himself and the door.  
"Oh look, our room" he smiles before producing the keyboard from his pocket and opening the door.  
   
Kimi stumbles a little into the room, ignoring Nico's eye roll he takes in the environment. The room is large white and open plan with large open sliding doors leading to an orange tiled balcony. The bed is king size at least with matching crisp white sheets and 30 pillows at least and a big flat screen has a foreign music channel funneling quite noise into the room.   
It's simple and Kimi can appreciate that, but he'd still rather be back in Nico's apartment.    
   
"You like? I chose this room especially. I had a bunch of crappy pictures and fake flowers taken out."  
   
Kimi nods in appreciation but not really taking Nico's words in. Just watching his lips move before assaulting them with his own again.   
They tumble onto the bed and Nico is working hard to keep Kimi going so he can try something he knows the older man is not going to like  
Kimi is payed out on his back with Nico straddling as he begins to undo the buttons of his shirt painfully slow. He leans forward to run his tongue along the now exposed skin of Kimi's chest. There's hardly an hair at all there, not like himself, and the skin tastes faintly salty from where he's sweating and Nico knows its now or never of he's to make his move.   
   
"Have you fucked other drivers on the paddock?" he asks, trying to sound non-chalant, slipping his hands into the now open short and pinching both of Kimi's nipples, making him squirm.   
   
"Only a couple" Kimi's reply is labored by heavy breathing and desire but he keeps it level and firm, his eyes not once flickering as he watches Nico remove his own shirt and belt then continue undressing him. "Have you?" he asks out of curiosity, not because he really cares. He knows the answer anyway so  why care?  
   
"Same. Most of the boys I see are not for the paddock"  
   
Kimi raises an eyebrow but remain impassive, laying still as Nico removes both their trousers and bites up his thigh, his lips resting only momentarily on the soft, stretched cotton of his boxer shorts before he sits up again but that's it and Kimi's had enough, he wants this now. He starts to push his boxer down, wriggling them underneath Nico.   
   
"And do you ways fuck them or do you sometimes let them fuck you?"  
   
Kimi isn't really listening, wondering why Nico has chosen now of all times to play 20 questions.   
   
"I always fuck them" he sighs, now taking down Nico's pants, lifting him up with ease to do so he kisses Nico's neck once softly before falling back into the bed, arms reaching forward to Nico's hips he closes his eyes. "Ready?" he asks. His cock is just I front of Nico, in all it's glory, it's desperate, he's desperate, for Nico to shuffle forward and position himself on it.   
But no, that's not how this is going to go and this is exactly when Nico wants him.   
   
"Have you never.. received?"  
   
"Once"  
   
"Why not again, you didn't like it?"  
   
"Not really. I dunno, it just didn't do anything for me"

“I think it could” And there’s something in Nico’s voice that sets alarms ringing in Kimi’s head, but not so much as when his cool hands slide around him and cup his arse. “Y’know, if it was with the right person”

Kimi pulls away, a hurt look in his eyes as he scowls at Nico. “No! No, I’m not.. we’re not…”

Nico isn’t going to take no for an answer though. He wants to test Kimi, see how far he’ll go for him. See if he is really interested in him, before he wastes time on him. _~~Before he invests any of his emotions.~~_  
He leans forwards, and Kimi is sat in front of him so he kneels and rests his hands on Kimi’s hips and dips his head into his lap, nuzzling him, before taking him in his mouth, hearing Kimi groan loudly and thrust upwards and he knows this will be easy, swallowing around him, teasing him with his tongue only a few times before climbing up him, pushing him down onto his back.

“You will love it. I’m pretty good, so I’ve been told”

“No!” Kimi tries to push him off, to sit up, but his efforts are half-hearted and Nico easily resists, leaning in again, kissing him roughly, parting his lips and wrestling his tongue, pulling away quickly. “I don’t want this” Kimi pants, no longer making physical attempts to stop Nico, almost pliant as the younger man rolls him onto his stomach.

“Well” Nico muses, positioning himself behind Kimi “You should have thought of that before you bribed me into this” and if Kimi could only see the wicked smile on his face as he eased himself into Kimi. He was slow, but not exactly gentle. He still made Kimi cry out in pain as he buried his full length into him. The Finn’s body was not use to this and at first it protested but as Nico pulled back slowly it began to adjust to him as Kimi began to relax, and Nico was sure, enjoy it.

“See, I said you’d enjoy it” Nico gloats.

“Fuck you”

“Oh no, _fuck **you**_!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really sorry I feel like the characterisaztion in this is slipping.. :/


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a disclaimer, this is a little OU. I wanted it set in about 2007 but wanted Michael as Nico’s teammate so.. be openminded. I hope this reads okay, it's a bit jumpy!

Kimi doesn’t want to speak to Nico afterwards. He lets Nico ease himself out and he wants to curl up in a ball and disappear. It takes every inch of will power he’s accumulated over the years to bite his tongue and get up and dress himself.

Nico is humming gently, knotting the condom and tossing it in a bin. He finds his pants and pulls them on, turning to see Kimi now fully clothed, pulling his black flat cap on.

“You don’t have to leave” Nico says it in a way that is almost taunting Kimi, _Kimi’s cowardice._ But his teasing is in vain and he’s resigned, knowing he will leave. He’d known that as soon as they’d started. If he hadn’t persuaded him to… _receive_ , maybe he would have. _Maybe._ But not after that, and now Nico will never know.

“I do” Kimi says flatly, desperately avoiding eye contact as he crosses the room to leave. He takes the door handle and stops. “W..we’re even now right?” his voice gives ever so slightly what his face doesn’t, and that’s just how uncomfortable he feels and now Nico feels bad.

“I didn’t.. do this just to.. get even” and although he hadn’t initially wanted to sleep with Kimi that first time, he had been bribed into it, that didn’t matter now because he’d enjoyed it. Something about having Kimi in that way, seeing him vulnerable, well it had sparked something in Nico. _That_ was why he’d done this. He was desperate to recapture the feelings their first encounter had stirred in him, and to understand them. He never usually had any feelings when sleeping with men.

“Just. Don’t” Kimi sighed, dropping his head to stare at the floor. He stiffens his shoulders for a moment before slumping them, still waiting for Nico to confirm.

He doesn’t want to. If he says yes, then that’s it. This is over. But what choice really does he have? “Okay” he whispers softly, his voice almost getting lost amongst the hum of the traffic outside and the ticking of the clock on the wall behind him. Almost, but not quite. It still reaches Kimi, despite his silent begging for it not to, and within a moment the door has opens, a rush of sold air covering Nico’s body in goose bumps, and closes, leaving him alone.

Nico sighed, flopping down on the bed with a loud sigh and closing his eyes. He’d gone full circle in a small amount of time and he feared that was it. Both him and Kimi had managed to get the upper hand with each other through clever tricks and gameplay but he doubted either would be willing to permanently relinquish power for good, so there was just nowhere for them to go.  
If Nico had been willing to, had not been so proud, maybe he could have begged Kimi to stay. But that just wasn’t in his nature. He expected the men he slept with to.. well appreciate him at least. He was a catch. Right?

 

Kimi was not in a good frame of mind when he left Nico’s. He was 80% convinced the best thing to do was go back down to a bar and drink himself under a table but he stopped himself for fear he’d end up going back to Nico’s and…

So instead he goes back to his and finishes a bottle of vodka and gets into bed and passes out. Getting blind drunk is a much better option than thinking about things. Than analysing the situation. He’s sure that what Nico’s doing. Wondering what’s going on, and how it could of gone differently. But not Kimi. He doesn’t care. He doesn’t..

 

Nico has to deal with his father in the morning, and his father is not happy.

“Sometimes Nico, I don’t think you’re mature enough to be out here on your own. It’s like I have to accompany you everywhere! _Faster! You’re dropping time!”_

Nico picks up his pace. His head is banging and his body aches but his dad is stood at the side of the gym with a stop watch and he’s not going to take any excuses.

“I’m fine dad, honestly” he breaths as he passes him.

“Really, because Raikkonen is not the company I expected you to keep. I thought Lewis was your friend?”

“I thought you got on with Kimi?” Nico remember his father first meeting him. Kimi had cooly made jokes, the way he does, and his father had laughed and been intrigued by the younger Finn, somewhat taking over from where he had left off.

“He’s clever. He has the… _chat._ That doesn’t mean he’s the kind of company I want my son to keep”

Nico shakes his head. His dad is tired, from travelling and being out last night, and there’s no reasoning with him when he’s in this mood.

“ _Faster”_ Keke pushes, and Nico’s almost full on sprinting from wall to wall. “I don’t like the way he looks at you” he calling after Nico who is getting out of breath.

“I don’t know what you mean” he pants, his chest burning a bit. “Can I stop-“

“No. Five more minutes, faster”

He hangs his head, pushing on, his calves beginning to stiffen, his legs feeling heavier as he pushes himself back to the wall and away again to the door.

“I don’t want you to associate with him. You must have your head in the game this season”

Nico wants to yell at his dad to shut up and keep out of his personal life but he doesn’t have the puff to talk anymore so he rolls his eyes and ignore him.

He hears the bleep of the stopwatch. “Okay done. Weights” Keke grunts, strolling over to bench and waiting impatiently for his son who’s got his head down, his hands resting on his knee’s to prop himself up, sucking in deep, laboured breathes. “Come on!”

“Dad!” Nico drags out, straightening up and stretching his hands behind the back of his head, his shoulders rising and falling hard.

“Fine. Ten minutes.”

Nico’s training regime doesn’t get any easier as the day progresses and by 4 he’s utterly wrecked. On the bright side, after his fathers chiding that morning he’d dropped it and Nico had been so busy he hadn’t had any chance to think of Kimi at all. But now, he was alone with his thoughts. That was never a good place for him to be. His mind always had a habbit of turning dark when he was alone with it.

The luxury hotel bath is full to the brim although half of it is bubbles, the jets are all going and he has lit candles and rested them on the sides of the tub. The wall is slightly unnervingly lined with mirrors and upon seeing his naked self, staring back at him Nico feels exposed and hops into the burning tub quickly, the water causing discomfort to him from head to toe. He wriggles to get comfortable but every muscle in his body is protesting and there’s nothing he can do.

Giving up he simply leans back and closes his eyes, letting the water level rest just below his bottom lip.

He tries to think about the car, the season, anything, but his mind keeps drifting back to Kimi. He can’t get his voice out of his head, his tone when he’d asked if they were even now. Nico was desperate to let him know that that hadn’t been his intention at all, but a small nagging voice at the back of his head had stopped him. A small voice saying _yes, that was partly it. An eye for an eye_

“Fuck” he punches the water, bubbles splashing up and running down the mirror.

 

Kimi was not in the mood for guests. In fact, he wasn’t in the mood for anything. He’d got up about midday, had some cereal and gone back to bed. Today was a day off, he had no obligations to do anything.   
Eric had tried to ring him a few times, but for that precise reason he’d ignore him.

At five o’clock however, a persistent knocking had woken him awake and kept him so. After about five minutes he dragged his body out of bed and opened the door.

“What?” he growls, coming face to face with Heikki Kovalainen.

Heikki smiles cheerily at Kimi’s state, clearly finding some kind of enjoyment in his friends pain. “You look shit man” he chuckles, walking in uninvited, slipping his wallet and keys out of hick pocket and slinging them on the table, dropping down onto the couch and putting his feet up, making himself comfy.

“I feel like shit, what do you want?” he says, not trying to force politeness.

“Get in the shower. We’re going out”

“I don’t want to”

“Tough. I’ve got us reservations at a bistro for 7 then there’s a nice bar in town, cocktails, we can go there after.”

“I don’t want to” Kimi repeats but the conviction is gone and Heikki’s simple silence is enough to push him into the shower. He feels guilty ditching Heikki as they rarely get any free time together and he’d already ditched him last night, he couldn’t really do it again. SO he had a shower, got dress, took a bunch of Panadol and slid his shades on, following Heikki to the bistro.

Kimi was one of those dudes that gets a massive hangover induced appetite.  He scarfs down a massive burger with chips, onion rings and a side salad and starts the drinking up again because he knows, that’s the best way of feeling better. Well, the easiest at least.

“I’m sorry I left you last night” Heikki said, and he genuinely was. He’d felt like a bad friend leaving Kimi with the likes of Nico. As soon as he’d got back to his room he’d regretted it and tried to ring Kimi, only to find his phone switched off.

“It’s fine” Kimi shrugs.

“No it’s not, you had to go back with _Nico”_

Kimi’s eyes flick up from his meal then, detecting the unfavourable tone in his voice. He cocks an eyebrow at his old friend, willing him to explain.

“I’ve just heard a lot about him” Heikki shrugs, pushing his spaghetti around his bowl with his fork, avoiding Kimi’s intense stare. He wasn’t jealous _, it was true_. Nico was young and hadn’t been on the scene for that long but he’d already got somewhat of a reputation. It wasn’t even that he slept around, no one could prove whether he did or not, but maybe that was just it. Everyone suspected there was someone between him and his teammate, and maybe that wouldn’t have been such a big deal if his teammate wasn’t Michael Schumacher. You just didn’t know with Nico.

“Rumours” Kimi shrugs, reaching across and plucking a slice of garlic bread from the younger Finn’s plate.

“They must have some substance-“

“Heikki you’ve known me long enough to know I don’t care about all that. About gossip”

And Heikki sighs. “The kid just seems like bad news” beginning to panic at how defensive Kimi is being towards Nico. He thought at worst they would have slept together that night, he hadn’t imagine Kimi having any kind of… affection towards the younger driver.

“Don’t get your knickers in a twist” Kimi rolls his eyes, downing his third cocktail and signalling the waiter to send their bill. “So, we hitting the town then or what?”

The two Finn’s head into town, stopping at a bar to do shots on the way, before finding a dingy club in a back alley pumping loud euro-trash. If Kimi was sober he might have rolled his eyes but in his half drunk state it just seemed like a good idea. So did ten shots for ten euros. And Absinthe, _and that’s never a good idea…_

“Hell yeah!” It’s nearly 3 am and Heikki is long gone. Kimi was worried that he’d be getting an earful from Heikki’s wife next time she see’s him. That’s usually the case anyway.

“Dude” Kimi shoves Heikki as he slings his arm across his shoulders, fist pumping the air. “I think, we should get you out of here” he suggests.

“Maaaaaaybe” the smaller man stumbles, grabbing a stranger to right himself. “Yeah, yeah alright” he jumps back as a rather dashing brunet man removes himself from Heikki, but upon seeing the small tan blonde grin spreads across his face and he winks. “Yup, I’m going!”

Kimi see’s his friend off into the cab and thinks about what he’s going to do now. He doesn’t want to go home…

“Hey” A tall blonde is leaning against the wall of the club, a tight black dress leaving little to Kimi’s imagination, she is circling a straw about in a bright red drink.

“Hi” he says quietly, his mind quickly being made to stay out, he follows her into the club, already feeling hot under the collar…

 

Nico was sweating. His blonde hair was pasted to his forehead. He threw the sheets back crossly, growling has he did so.

“Fucksake” he cursed, jumping out of bed and opening his bedroom window, sticking his face out to the cool air and taking a deep breath away from the stifling room.

He cast his eyes briefly to his alarm clock. 3:09. He hadn’t slept a wink, despite being exhausted. How could he not sleep after that gruelling workout earlier..

He looked out at the street. It was almost silent, yellow lamps lit a taxi cab parked outside the apartments opposite, a drunk bunch of women were staggering across the pavement, arm in arm, shrill voices just reaching his ears 10 stories high. He felt in despair. All he could think about, all he had thought about for weeks now was Kimi fucking Raikkonen and he didn’t know what to do. He was dreading going the paddock. The paddock where _he’d_ be.

He was beside himself with emotions he’d so long kept buried. He leaned into the night, knuckles grasping the window frame, toes against the wall, levering him. He thought what it might feel like to fall, to fly. To drop from the window, from the planet. Away from f1 and press and his father and Kimi.. He didn’t know where these thoughts had come from but they were overpowering everything.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So the final chapter. I hope you like it.   
> Warning: slight trigger warnings. Depression and suggestions of suicidal thoughts.

Nico was lost. He didn’t feel like himself. He felt like a candle being burnt at both ends but they’d finally met. There was nothing left of him.   
He was leaning a long way out of the window now. A Merc glided past on the street below.   
His blonde hair was flapping around, hitting his forehead.  
He swallowed hard.

He left the window, only for a brief moment, to pry a bottle of vodka from the fridge, opening the top clumsily and taking a swig. He loved to party, but not usually to drink. He doesn’t like to be out of control. However he _is_ half Finnish. He can drink vodka, if occasion calls.

If life had a purpose it was escaping him. He was feeling totally hollow. He wondered what it would feel like. Sailing through the air. Falling. Exhilarating. Maybe it would feel a bit like driving a formula one car. Not how that  felt now. Now it was just samey. It made him ache all over and made him hate himself because he was never good enough. Never the best.  
No. But like the first time. Like in gp2. With Nelson. With Lewis. When it had all been new and exciting. When he was excelling, making his father proud. When he would overhear people saying _‘that young Rosberg good looks fast. I bet we’ll be seeing him in formula one soon’._ Back when he had a future. He was never going to beat Red Bull and Sebastian Vettel so what was the point? He was too old. He wasn’t going to be champion so why even bother.

He took a few more long chugs of the clear burning liquid, feeling it slide down his throat, hot all the way down to his stomach, feeling fuzzy in his head.

He was totally blind to see any of his achievements of the last few years. He’d constantly out driven his teammate, and that was no small deal when your teammate was Michael Schumacher and even when he did triumph, he never stayed pleased for long. He soon finds a way to suggest it hadn’t been due to him. It had been luck. Good engineering. Other people’s failings.

He closes his eyes. He’s burning up. He can feel beads of sweat on his forehead. Often the people the most composed, the happiest on the outside, are actually the most broken. He was a perfect example of that. People that moaned all day about their problems didn’t know what it was like to feel you couldn’t do that.

He shakes his hair off his face, leaning further in to the night. Crazing the cool slap of the wind on his burning cheeks, refreshing on the cool tracks tears had left down his face.

Then his hand slips on the frame, too much to drink, and drops out the window and his whole body lurches forward in a heart stopping second as its thrown towards the edge of the window and Nico can’t breath, his eyes shooting open at the  50 foot drop before him as it almost becomes his reality, but his legs give way, his knee’s dropping to the floor, rooting his to the ground as his chest hits the window frame and his body steals.

The slip is agony. Physical agony across his ribs which are burning from they’re collision with the solid plastic frame, and mental agony at the tiny thought that that could have been it and the fact he doesn’t know if he’s relieved it was, or disappointed.

He slides down to the floor, pulling his knees up to his throbbing chest and folding his arms across them, resting his forehead down he closes his eyes tightly. He wants to cry properly like he did when he was a kid, but he can’t anymore.

 

Kimi looks at Elodie. She’s tall, blonde, slim, beautiful. She’s the answer to all his problems. His mind had not been his own for… ages.. Not since he’d been with Nico. That tall blonde, he was sure, could be the end of him.

Kimi hated feeling so out of control. So raw to his emotions. It was something he wasn’t use to and hadn’t enjoyed.

Elodie’s tongue was in his mouth, half down his throat, insistent in its please and forceful against his own. Her right hand slid under his arm and was holding him just below his shoulder blade, holding him to her tightly. The other had snaked its way down his stomach and was now cupping his ever-bulging jeans. He had one hand on the back of her neck, the other on her arse and his mind, his mind was racing. At first it had felt wrong, like betrayal. Like, he should tell Nico. But the more instant her left hand became, the more those thoughts were pushed out of his head. He’d begun groaning, thrusting his hips towards her, spurring her on. God he was acting so needy he hated it.

He breaks away quickly, trying to gain some control over the situation. He gaps for air but the club is stuffy and the air is thick and lacking oxygen and Elodie is leaning in again, her lips pushing hard against his, her body even harder. And he’s pushing her off again. Why is she getting the message? What does she want from him?

“Elodie!” he grunts, actually feeling nervous as his back comes up against the wall and he has no easy escape from her as she begins to snake her arms back around him, making him feel more claustrophobic than he had ever done before. His breath is catching in his throat as begins to panic a bit.

“Please!” he turns his head to the side, trying desperately to get her lips away from his. He’d never met a woman so insistent! Then again, he never usually gave them the time of day. And this was exactly why.

She pulls away abruptly.  “What?!” she spits.

Kimi braves a glance at her. She looks pissed.

“What? You’ve been dancing with me and making out for almost an hour and now what? You’ve changed your mind?!”

He bites his lip, wondering how to get out of this one. “I’m sorry. It’s.. there’s this guy-“

But before he has time to finish her hand collides hard with his cheek. “Guy?! You’re disgusting!” she screeches, storming off.

He’s left stunned for a moment, his cheek stinging. His immediate instinct is to run after her and yell but then he realises he’s just relieved to have got away.  
He drops back against the bare brick wall of the club and can’t help but chuckle to himself. Nico would like this story.

Nico. He sucks in a breath. Maybe he should go and see Nico. Sort this mess out. He likes him. More than he should, and it’s been stressing him out, especially as he knows Nico likes him too. He could never be with him. He’d never date a guy. He hated the amount of media interest in his life as it was, he could never give them a story like that.

But Nico was a professional and he would know that. He just needs to clarify. To make sure they are both on the same page.  He’d love to… spend time with Nico, occasionally. Tonight. But it had to mean nothing. He had to not feel guilty when he spent the night with someone else.

He sets off out of the club. On his way to Nico. He’ll send him a text. He’ll go for a drink at the bar below Nico’s apartment. That way Nico can choose.

 

Nico lifts his head lazily at the loud sound of his phone vibrating against his bedside desk. It’s probably his dad. His wonderful dad who just doesn’t understand. Who is just too much tougher and too much more talented than Nico to ever understand, to know what he’s putting his son threw. Keke doesn’t even realise the pressure he feels, to live up to his surname. It’s disarming.

Maybe he should ring Kimi. Invite him here. Maybe he could cheer him up? But Nico knows that won’t help. That that’s part of the problem. _Kimi._ Kimi was gonna chew him up and spit him out and smile the whole while.

Nico had never considered being with a guy, never seen them in that way until he started racing in gp2. That was when he noticed his appeal, to other men. He realised that they would treat him differently. All he had to do was _flirt_ a little. So that’s what he did. If he wanted something from someone, or just needed an ego boost, a few compliments and a flick of his hair seemed to do the trick.  
Though he took it too far. With Nelson. He knew the Brazilian, so different from him, had real feelings for him. He should of stopped when he’d realized. Stopped catching his eye, and holding it just a little too long. Stopped _‘accidently’_ brushing past him. Their evening runs… _Oh Nelson._ Sometimes now, he hated himself for the way he’d treated that boy. He had him wrapped around his little finger..

But he was young and foolish and he’d never do that now. He’d made his peace with the other driver and he’d learnt how to ‘play the game’.

Kimi, he feared, had not. Nico was pretty sure Kimi knew he liked him, and that hadn’t stopped him. It showed no signs of stopping him. Nico was quite sure he was enjoying the power he had over him. Sure, he acted as though he might like him back. But he didn’t. No one was ever going to really like Nico for his personality. Kimi was just very clever.

He scrunched his eyes closed, sucking in a deep laboured breath.

He was disturbed again by his phone vibrating. It did this for 30 seconds. Stopped. Then started again. He sighed and slowly pushed himself up off the wall. His chest was still causing him agony as he dragged himself across to his bed and dropped down.

 _Fucking Raikkonen._ He slams the rejects button, shaking his head bitterly. “Leave me alone” he growls, laying down and pulling the quilt around him. Cocooning himself.

 

Kimi frowned at his phone as it stopped ringing abruptly. When he tried to ring a third time, it cut straight threw answering. He had signal? He ordered himself a glass of water. He had been feeling a bit fuzzy headed in the club and he had a feeling he was gonna need his wits about him tonight. There was Dutch courage, then there was just plain wasted.

He tried ringing Nico again and straight away got his answering phone again. He bit his lip, thinking of what to do next. Nico wasn’t answering his phone. That seemed unlike him. He was a tart to say the least. Kimi thought he enjoyed the intention… his attention.

For some reason, he had a bad feeling. Something in the pit of his stomach didn’t feel quite right, and despite his plan to give Nico the choice of seeing him, he had an unexplained desire to go up and see him.

 

Nico is drunk.  His eyes are pressed tightly shut trying to block out the spinning room. He swallows down his nausea. He’s still sweating. Maybe he’s ill. Maybe he’s coming down with flue because he feels like he’s going mad. He can’t stop the thoughts in his head. If he died, right now, how long would it take anyone to notice? Sure, his dad would in a few days if he was late for training. But would anyone else? Would anyone before that?

 

Kimi is sliding his empty glass across the bar from hand to hand, agitatedly. “Fuck” he growls, slamming it down and getting up. He’s had enough of this bullshit. If Nico isn’t going to answer his calls…

 

A loud knocking at the door is disturbing Nico again. He’d switched his phone off, hoping to fall into an alcohol induced coma. If he could just get some sleep…  
But the knocking continues, gets louder, more feverent. He pulls the quilt tighter over his ears, hoping to block it out. It stops a moment later, and just as Nico’s about to sigh with relief when he hears the door fly open, hitting the wall on the otherside.

“Nico?” Kimi’s voice is flat, and monotonous but there was something a bit softer than usually in it.

Nico was mortified to be caught in such a state so he just stayed wrapped up, ignoring the older man, willing the bed to swallow him up, and never spit him out.

“Mate..” and Kimi’s voice grew softer still as his footsteps  grew louder as he crossed the room before Nico felt the bed dipping as he sat down next to him. A heavy hand rests on his covered shoulder, shaking him a little. “Nico, you alright buddy?”

Nico huffs, curling tighter into a ball. Kimi is the last person he wants to speak to. Kimi, who has it all so figured out. He must think Nico so pathetic..

Kimi eyes flicker up to the nearly empty bottle of vodka, sat on the floor by the open window, letting cold air into the chilly apartment. He tries to pry the quilt away from the younger man but he’s having none of it. He sighs and drops back onto the bed, laying down next to Nico, staring up at the plain white ceiling, his legs still off the bed. He stretches his arms up and folds them behind his head.

He lets out a long slow breath, letting the silence in the room surround them for a few minutes.

“I know how you feel” he finally says, quietly. “I know the pressure. I feel it every day of every week” Nico makes no noise to suggest he’s listening and Kimi hesitates, before continuing. “There are hundreds of us in motor sport, not all in formula one, but we all have the same dream. We all want to be champion. All of us. But only one person can be. That means every year, the rest of us…” his voice trails off as he struggles to put into words how he’s feeling.

Finally, Nico emerges. Well, kind of. He loosens his cocoon and grumbles “you’ve been world champion, you don’t understand. My dad-“

“This has _nothing_ to do with your dad. He loves you unconditionally. You think he’s too hard on you but I think it’s just as much, if not more the other way round. Nico, you’re your own worst enemy.”

“You don’t understand”

“The help me to” Kimi didn’t mean to say it. It just.. slipped out. He shuts his eyed, nervous again now as to where this is going. He feels the bed moved and looks down as Nico’s shuffles and moves to lie flat on his back next to Kimi, all the while keeping the quilt covering him, from head to toe. Kimi sucks in a deep breath, mustering all his courage, and slides himself under the quilt too, so his arm is pressed against the young Germans. “Nico?” he prompts, nudging him with his elbow.

The German wiggles next to him, huffing. “I just… I _can’t_ do this. I feel like… I’m living my life for _everyone_ but me. I never.. no one cares what I want..”

“Don’t you want to drive?”

“I do. I just.. feel like I’m losing myself by driving”

“You don’t have to” and Kimi understands more than he’s letting on. “I.. I felt like that. I expect a lot of us do at some point. You just need to regain control”

“I cant-“

“You can!” and Kimi’s struggling with this heart to heart so he reaches across and takes Nico’s hand, squeezing it. “You can.”

They lay like that for a long while, hand in hand, until Kimi senses Nico’s breathing slow and deepen as he drifts off to sleep. He slips his hand out of Nico’s, smiling to himself at the soft groan coming from his companion. He skips over, shutting the window and screwing the lid on the vodka, hiding it at the back of Nico’s fridge. He props a pillow under Nico’s head and folds the quilt back so he can breath.

“Fuck it” he mumbles, kicking his shoes and jeans off and sliding back into the bed next to Nico, pulling him against him and burying a kiss into his hair. He’s been fighting a battle with himself since the first time he’d bumped into Nico in that club and struck up a deal and he’d been just settling on one side of the field but now was very far on the other.  
“How about.. we _both_ stop caring about what others think and just.. do what we want?” Because it’s not him that doesn’t think he could be with Nico. It’s what he knows everyone else would think. But that shouldn’t matter.  
He’s not sure if Nico hears, if he’s even awake, but he makes a soft, happy noise in the back of his throat and snuggles down closer to the Finn. “Starting with us..”

“Stop talking Kimi” Nico whispers, dropping an arm over him and smiling. Not many people get to say that.


End file.
